I'm always in a rush. I've been so since I got into med school. Whatever it is I'm doing, theres a feeling in my chest pulling me towards whatever I have to read that day. Its both a blessing and a curse. I can finish eating in less than 10 minutes if I'm stressed enough. And then when I sit down to study, I rush some more cause I have to read this slide, watch that video, and so on. No matter what, it never ends. You'd think it does when I'm on breaks or when I'm in attachments that are more or less chill but, then I rush myself to relax ቶሎ ቶሎ before the storm comes back and all hell breaks loose again. I try to cram all my stress and inner turmoil within a matter of days because if I don't, Monday will come, I'll be crazy busy, and I'll still be miserable.

This feeling always makes me wish I could have 2 lifetimes. One where I'd dive head first into my career and be fully focused into what I'm doing. Imagine all the possibilities of what I could get done. I wouldn't have to worry about work life balance. Maybe ObGyn? I don't know. And a second one, to enjoy the finer things in life. Looking at the sun just admiring the bliss I feel when I see her. Watching movies that intrigue me. Having coffee. Laughing with the girls lounge wst all afternoon. Being with him all the time. Staying up late listening to loud music. Going somewhere new. And one day, having a family of my own. Giving them my 100. Enjoying their company to the fullest. Wouldn't it be great?

💛