The Wonder of Elias.
I hated you, for the very same reasons I hated myself. You were happy and content with what you had, subtly I felt insecure by your presence. your belief and hope in a better tomorrow blindsided me. You were so healthy that you radiated bliss and light.
I had non of what you were offering for free. Funny how deep down I was so sick and could not bear to see another person in another world opposite to mine.
it seems apparent to me now that I was in pain and wanted to disseminate my ideology of sorrow. it was unthinkable to think I could be wrong and be made better by your words. I laugh now as an old man who sees you for what you really are Elias. you truly were lucky, and I am glad I let my self get the help I needed to love my self as you once did.
Shocking it is to see just how we dig in our heels and resist better things, shocking it is how we would rather pull those who are better to the pits of hell we create, and all this just so they can see our pains and sorrow. All a desperate cry for help.
LOL it embarrasses me to see the rear view mirror to witness how I had been.
[Stop holding on, let go move on be better I know its hard but let go of the pain. you truly do deserve better whoever you are.]